Is it ok to say that I’m pretty much over boats, buses and planes?
Right now I feel that being with my family is so much more important than ticking off another tourist wonder.
Have you ever felt like that?
I’m writing this post in a tiny garret appartment on top of the ancient walls of the Diocletian’s palace in Split. See the tiny add on on to the building, right at the top in the picture below? The building is truly ancient and it’s part of the palace which used to belong to a Roman Emporer.
I keep feelng as if it might tumble over onto the Riva below, the impressive broad walkway where people preamble and the cafes are vibrant and packed, all lined up infront of the very busy harbour.
The little flat is built in haphazard fashion, as if as an add-on onto the old building below. It’s like a pigeon loft, and yes I’ve spotted a pigeon, and a cat.
The view from the tiny window in the kitchenette area is beautiful. I think a writer or an artist should live here permanently.
We’ve been to the market and bought fresh cheese that’s made in Hvar, fresh sugared figs, strawberries, local wine, local olive oil, and a very fine Dalmatian smoked ham which we’ve been picking at all day.
Relaxing.
Like I said: “Lucky, I know”.
We arrived back into Split this morning. For 7 days our home was a small cabin one of four on the top deck – with bunk beds and a tiny wet room.
We had a fantastic time cycling and I did a number of very stiff hills which I’m quite proud about. See below – that’s Stari Grad down by the river and we’d just climbed up about 7 kms from there.
My hubby was a lot quicker than me though, huffed and puffed less and looked much more at one with his bike and surroundings.
The spring flowers were lovely.
But I don’t want to go to island hopping to Hvar and towns like Stari Grad or Jelsa today … I want to go home now please.
My Mum isn’t well.
And send thought waves to my Mum.
How to stifle the anxiety monster.
Live in the Moment.
Firstly I think it’s important to live in the now. Everything is ok right now. If I think of the future then it isn’t all ok, so I must put all those thoughts out of my head. Immediately.
Stop worrying about what ‘might be’.
If we have to change plans in a hurry I can cope with that. I Really Can. So worrying about what we might have to do isn’t going to help.
It’s ok not to always feel happy about things.
Thirdly I need to accept that as lucky as I am, it’s ok not always to be happy with the situation.
We can’t be in control
I am not perfect and God didn’t send me to earth to put order into the world.
You can’t always have what you want
I wanted to travel … we made copious plans … they seemed like a good idea at the time, but now things have changed and I my previous inkling that family really does trump geographical mobility were for me, right. But I can’t just swing back and forth at the drop of the proverbial hat, so it’s a question of not getting what I want and I’ll have to deal with the consequences of my actions.
Linking today to Travel Photo Thursday.
Anyway, I’m not the Oracle, and I’m in a bit of a tizz. So please tell me, what else would you add?
20 Days to a better you – Day 1 – Dance in the rain, don’t wait for the rain to pass
Bummer, I’m so sorry to hear about your Mum, Jo. Being that far away must be difficult but I’m joining you in sending her loads of positive thoughts. Hope you get to see her soon.
Thanks Marcia x
Traveling for weeks on end can take its toll. You’re out of your comfort zone completely. As amazing as everything is, there’s the stress of a constant unfamiliar environment. Then, you have your mother not being well. I think I would feel much like you do.
Thanks for your supportive words Nancie. I think we tend to forget that as lovely as adventure is, the stress of constant and changing unfamiliarity can build up over time.
You’ve got to listen to your body and mind. I don’t really know you but it’s obvious to me that you’re not enjoying where you are, or the moment. Split is wonderful, but return when you’ll be able to enjoy it. As others have said, you should go take care of other things.
Yes, Rob – Split deserves better attention than I was able to give it at the time, and of course now the other things have been taken care of to the best of my ability … it’s somewhere I’d love to go back. So to Slovenia, which I see you know a bit about 🙂
Family crises always trump travel – easily said but not always easy to put into action. I’m traveling a lot this summer – mostly short haul stuff but in the back of my mind I have legitimate concerns about parents. Really you’ve said it, others have said it – do your best to appreciate this great trip and if you’re sick of ruins & castles go to the things and see the things that make you happy. I hope it all turns out well for you – and your mom.
Thanks Leigh – it was a fabulous trip just my mind wasn’t in the right place towards the end because of my Mum. Thanks for your kind thoughts and philosophical outlook 🙂
Hi Jo
By now you are home and I hope all is well for you and your family.
Croatia looked amazing and right now it’s 28C in Dublin – which is heatwave for us here!
Take good care
Liz
I love Jill’s reply. We are of an age when worry over parents can spoil our enjoyment of holidays, but I think it is important to still have them. It is a toughie. Sending positive thoughts to your Mum.
Thanks Jan x
Thank you for your understanding and heartwarming words Caz. They mean a lot to me .
I hope your Mum is okay Jo. Sending you lots of positive vibes. I’ve really loved following your journey and I totally understand how you are feeling. Travel is so amazing, but it can be so draining. Your body and soul are telling you to rest now so you gotta listen.
Much love to you
Ahhh the tyranny of distance Jo. Just catching up on the bloggersphere after being out of action for a while. I hope you’re okay xx
Hello Tracey, it’s great to see you back! And Thank You 🙂
I empathise with you Jo. There have been moments when I have wanted to go home too after 4 months on the road. Firstly a dear uncle of mine passed away, then my daughter broke a bone in her foot and wanted her mummy and then my dear old dad recently had eye surgery. So I feel the tugs of family and wanting to be there for them. Your trip sounds absolutely amazing and I do hope you enjoy the remainder of it. xx
Thanks Kathy. Sounds like you’ve had some ‘moments’ too but I hope you are also managing to enjoy the remainder of your wonderful trip.
That’s bad timing. Hope your Mum gets better soon. I think you’ll look back on your travels with pleasure even if you are over it now! My travel advice is always less places, more time. So if you have six months another time stick to one or two countries only and get a base while you’re there. Makes it much more enjoyable because constant travel is exhausting. Lots of love and thoughts wherever you may be now and to your mum too. x A
Hi Jo
It’s very normal to feel that way – I nearly always start ot feel homesick after a few weeks away. Hope your Mum is improving.
Croatia is so beautiful – Split is the home town of my grandfather and Hvar the home town of my grandmother – I love those places.
Take care Jo and we look forward to seeing you on your return
Thanks Ingrid X oh that’s so interesting .. I had no idea!
Sorry to hear about your mum, I live in another country to my dad and it hurts a lot. Croatia looks divine, safe travels xxxx
Thanks Rae, see we still finding things in common!
I guess everyone can commiserate with your dilemma. Due to role reversal at middle age, we feel an obligation to be there for our family when needed. If only we could at all times! On one trip, I didn’t tell my mom we were leaving town. It seemed she only got sick when we left for a vacation. I hope somehow you can relax and believe that your mom will always be close by in thought, even when far apart.
Thank you Neva x
oh JO I understand this feeling so well – it has happened to me 3 times – firstly when we were about to go on a 4 week holiday to the Uluru and the NT, my Dad had a minor stroke and ended up in hospital only a couple of days before we were due to leave. He told me to go on holiday and said that he would be very upset if I didn’t. I went. My sister came down from the farm. All was well.
2nd – my Mum ended up in hospital a couple of days before we flew to Canberra for a week so.There I was CRYING at WORK because I didn’t want to go on holidays, I wanted to stay home by her side. But everything was booked and paid for so I went., The Dr agreed to keep her in hospital till I returned. All was well.
3rd – when we were on our 6 week SAust trip last year my Dad had a bad fall on his Ghan trip. He sounded so distressed on the phone and told me he wished I wasn’t so far away. I sat in the car out in the middle of the SAust desert crying, and my husband said we could turn around and drive back home. I rang my sister she picked my Dad up from the airport and drove him home, sorted things out, and stayed for a few days. My son only lives a few minutes from my Dad. All was well.
I guess what I am trying to say is, this is one of the problems of traveling at our age when we have ageing parents. You never know when something will happen to them which will want you rushing to there side. But if we worried about what “might” happen we would never go anywhere.
At least you are only a few days away from your Mum Jo. Would she really want you cutting short your trip? Would you if it were you and your children? You will see her at the end of the week. Until then, smile, try and put it all out of your mind, and enjoy your last days of your holiday. I KNOW it is easier said than done. You will be with her soon.
I send you my love and hugs that “all will be well”.
Ahh, thank you Jill. Your experiences have made me feel better x
Wishing you and your Mum well Jo. You will be home soon. There are some things you can’t really change. Your Mum would not want to think this was spoiling the end of your holiday (and make sure to relay to her the lovely places you’ve seen when you get back, if she’s well enough). Look to your husband for support (which I’m sure you’re doing) and accept his wise counsel. Remind yourself you are a fine daughter to your dear Mum.
Thanks for your wise counsel Kathryn x
I can feel your pain Jo. Often, when nearing the end of a holiday, I have also felt that longing for home (wherever in the world that happens to be at the time) but it must be extra hard knowing your Mum isn’t well. Thinking of you and your Mum. xxx
Thank you Janet x